Today, I’ve got a small, but powerful daily habit for you….
“always ask a better question”
When life kicks you in the ass, which it has an unfortunate habit of doing, step up, ask a better question and turn that negative situation, into a positive one.
Unfortunately, you probably don’t even realise you’re asking yourself a shitty question. That’s the first step!
Be aware of the questions going on in your brain. When something happens to screw up your day, take notice of your internal dialogue, your ‘self-talk’.
No doubt you’ll be saying things to yourself like; “Why does this crap always happen to me?” , or “Nothing ever goes right for me, I don’t know why I bother!”, or maybe even “I knew this would happen. I shouldn’t have even started this, I’m so stupid!”
Instead of letting the demon in your head drag you down, ask yourself an empowering question that gets you back on track.
Can you give me some examples?
Sure 🙂 The question will change depending on the situation, but here are a few examples to give you an idea…
- What can I learn from this experience?
There’s always something you can learn from any problem or situation. It might be that a small change in the process may have stopped it happening, or brought the issue to light before it became a problem. It may be simply that you know not to do it again. Whatever the learning experience is, find it. When you have, you’ve just turned your bad experience into a good one.
- What’s good about this?
Try to find something good in the experience. Maybe, because ‘X’ failed, you’ve realised that if you’d done ‘Y’, you can shorten the completion time, or reduce the overall cost, for example.
- What, about this situation will make me a better person?
Sometimes, making a mistake, or making the wrong choice will give you an unexpected ‘life lesson’. It could be something simple like, asking for help when you’re not sure. Or, maybe it’s something like realising the way you dealt with a situation was inappropriate, or unjust.
- What can I do differently next time, to improve my chances of success?
Think about what happened and try to identify if you can do anything in the future that could identify the issue before it occurred. Maybe, you could use a check sheet to measure the success, or lack of success of each component part, before moving on, etc.
- How can I switch this situation around, so it helps me next time?
There’s always a way to change your fortunes. Just because you’ve had a failure this time, doesn’t mean it’s going to fail next time. Obviously, there’s always a chance it will, but never give up! There are dozens of examples from people who are hugely successful, that believe they got there BECAUSE they failed!
I’m sure you’ll be able to think of many more examples. Just remember that no matter what experience you’ve endured, it can have a positive outcome. Choose to ask yourself an empowering question instead of a restricting one.
From today on, whenever you’re hit by a curve-ball, don’t just react. Take a few seconds to ask yourself a question that empowers you.
If you constantly ask better questions, you’ll always get a positive answer. Once you’ve got that positive answer, you can begin to build a better outcome next time.
It’s very easy to slip into a world of self-doubt and blame yourself for everything bad that happens. So, stop the slide before it begins.
In any situation, you always get more of what you focus on. Focus on the negative and you’ll attract more ‘bad’. Focus on the positive and you’ll get more ‘good’.
Do you have any empowering questions that you like to use? Let us know your examples, by sharing them in the comments below.